My dear,
I have never been much of a songwriter, and often my poetry is bad in the way of angsty adolescence, only without much angst. My mastery of language is in debate, in picking out weaknesses in others, and only on my best days, my own. So I write to you in the language of rhetoric, not to destroy your facade but mine, and to figure out how yours is built and why.
We were friends, but for whatever reason, we have reached a place where that bridge no longer totally connects, and I fear that soon it may break altogether and leave us swimming to shore, seeking less tenuous routes to travel.
That was a lengthy and inscrutable metaphor if ever I wrote one. Basically the truth is this: I like you, maybe more than you like me or even less. I know that I am attracted to you, for what you are, for what you try to be, and for what I think we could be together. This is a case where an expression of feeling has become cliche because it is apt. At the end, you are the person whom I have chosen and I just want to know whether you might choose me. Today I am not seeking forever, I am only seeking today. And maybe tomorrow -- we'll see how it goes.
In all honesty, I am frustrated that nearly everyone wants the same thing, and yet I am having so much difficulty getting it from you. This apparent failure on my part leads to some questions in my weakest parts that my rational self would prefer to disallow: am I inadequate? incapable? simply unattractive? too feminine, too masculine? too expressive? too veiled? too blind to see what is before me or too stupid to understand what it means?
What I fear most of all is that I have somehow left you asking the same questions of yourself, and so instead of our being a greater whole together than our loosed constituent parts, we have made each other individually less whole than before. I fear my ability to feel so much and fear the result of scarring so that I cannot feel at all: for me, for the world, for you.
I have come to this: some part of me is lacking, and some smarter part knows to seek it in you. Help me find it, and I will do my best to find yours in me.
Forever and today,
Me
