We Reuned.

There is nothing to make one feel tan and svelte like spending a weekend at the Mall of America, where my maternal family celebrated a reunion.  However, I learned there an important lesson about weight on log flumes.  My brother-in-law went with my nephew, and said I would get just a splash, "Like when you spill water on yourself."  (Yes, this happens more often than I am comfortable admitting.)  However, when my brother-in-law, my sister, my nephew, and I went on the log flume together, we got SOAKED.  Well, let me clarify: I got soaked.  If my sister and brother-in-law got a Methodist baptism, my nephew and I got the full on, Disciples of Christ, believer's dunking.  In the name of the Creator, the Christ, and the Holy SPIRIT of consumerism.  Fortunately, we were in a mall.  So I squished over to Old Navy and bought myself a dry outfit; I'd been wanting a pair of goucho pants anyway.